I have sat down to write many times over the past couple of weeks and haven't been able to do it. I have written content and deleted it. I have tried to write but couldn't express what I was feeling. I just haven't been able to get it out. It wasn't until this evening while we were having dinner with some friends and sharing with them that they encouraged me to write about it on the blog. I was reminded of why we are doing this whole thing. The title: Life of a Missionary.
The tag: A window into the Hinger family's journey into missions.
Here is the window: It has been a rough couple weeks for our family.
We knew that the choice to move our family to Croatia was a step of faith. We knew hard moments would come. We just thought they would come when we got to Croatia. Instead the Lord has been walking us down a path of much resistance and forcing us to realize we need to be completely dependent on him now not just when we arrive in Croatia.
I have been searching for a job for the past few months and nothing has opened up. When I say nothing, I mean nothing consistent. I have had the joy of one day jobs. One day here, one day there. For instance, I helped a friend of mine with his company as they moved vending machines in and out of different office buildings. It was a full day of wrestling 1000 pound machines around tight corners and into freight elevators. A few days later I had the opportunity to substitute teach at Aurora Christian School which was a great experience teaching 6th grade Bible and intro to guitar. I also have helped frame an unfinished basement with a close friend of mine. These haven't been terrible and I am thankful for each opportunity. The tough part is knowing when something might pop up or not. It is all very inconsistent and makes it a very difficult process as we plan out the next year of our lives. It has also been very defeating for me as the husband and provider for our family.
As a result we have been getting our house ready to sell so we can reduce our overhead costs. We will be moving into our mother in laws house which is only a couple blocks away and in the same neighborhood. There are a lot of memories in this house and it is an emotional experience packing up, throwing things away, and closing a chapter of our families lives.
I have come to a point where I can't do anything on my own anymore. I am so utterly dependent on God it's not even funny. Imagine having everything taken from you in a matter of a month; job, home, sense of security, etc. It is terrifying. However, through it all God keeps leading us and confirming that this is the direction we are to be walking in. We know that we will not turn back. The questions have come to mind, "Did we make the wrong decision?" or "Why isn't God doing something?" And all of it has helped our family to know that we know that we know, we are not turing back. We are IN. We are following his call and as hard as the road is before us we will be resolved to trust him regardless of the circumstances around us.
I don't write these things to sound preachy. I write them as a reminder to myself and to my wife as we have said these words over and over:
"The Lord Our God is Ever Faithful!"
If anyone out there is interested in purchasing a house in Warrenville we would love to talk to you before we list this thing with a realtor. You can call or text me at 630-460-1694 or shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org
Here are a few details about the place:
- 1800 sqft
- 3 Bedrooms
- 3 Bathrooms
- Attached garage
- Hardwood floors
- Fenced in backyard